Half-Pint has Typhoid.

I don't know exactly what triggered this synapse firing, but this evening after our nightly round of Jeopardy, I looked over at N.O. and asked, "Do you think we could play Oregon Trail online?" We shortly discovered that the answer is yes; and, if you want to play OLD SCHOOL Oregon Trail, there's only one place to go: here.* Within mere moments, we were bartering, starving, and fording our way to the Promised Land. Sure, 4/5 of us died en route. But somewhere along the way, we also learned a little something about suffering, economics, Manifest Destiny, and love.

Luckily, N.O. is very good at hunting with arrows (I mean the keyboard kind), which saved us all from starvation. Actually, it only saved him from starvation. I think I died of a broken arm. But whatever. I outlasted most of the oxen.

Die, Tree! Die!

I highly recommend wasting a few valuable hours re-living your elementary school years with this game. The insanely dated graphics and super-cheesy music will send your senses reeling backward in time. Somehow, it even smells like 1988.

Happy Trails.

*By the way, the above-linked website also has lots of other cool old games, like Pitfall, Pac-Man, and Frogger. Stupid frog.